Time to Walk Away

Watching Milk left me wanting to take to the streets to protest.  Protest what?  Oh, we could start with Amendment 2 in Florida or Proposition 8 in California.

After reliving the struggle to get gays on the radar as humans deserving of human rights, I feel like, in many ways, I am too silent.  Too unappreciative of my freedoms.  I want every person that knows me to know that I am gay.  Because, in reality, the ways that I am similar to them outweigh the ways in which my gayness makes me different.  But how will they ever know, if I don’t show them?

My most recent act of protest, of standing up and being counted, was to leave a church that I love because of the denomination’s 2008 decisions on policies involving homosexuals:

Methodists this week rejected replacing a sentence in its Book of Discipline — which says the church “does not condone the practice of homosexuality” — with other phrases, including one saying Christians differ on the issue. The measure to change the language also was rejected at the last conference in 2004.

Methodists this week also voted against a proposal to change a policy allowing pastors to keep gays and lesbians from joining the denomination’s churches.  (Associated Press 2008)

I can’t be part of a church that supports bigotry.  I don’t believe that God hates me because I am gay.  Hell, I don’t believe God hates anyone.  I do not believe my life is a sin.  And I refuse to allow Jesus’ followers (who, in this instance, are doing a rather shoddy job of following Him at all) to condemn me, when my only crime is living as God created me.

My act of defiance may be small.  Only those close to me at church have noticed my absence at all.  But I know that walking away from an organization that does not respect me has given me a greater sense of self-reliance.  I hold my head higher because I refused to acquiesce my dignity simply to belong.

In the smallest of ways, I carry my own torch.  Every act matters.  No matter how small.  But I probably shouldn’t walk into my classroom tomorrow with a Lesbian Avengers poster, right?  Right?

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